Telling lies – No Mamma!!!

“Today my teacher told me, I am the best girl of the class”, “Today I told my friend that I have an elephant at home” – Such lies are quite common among the kids of age 4 or 5. You need not worry about that. Harmless joke is just a part of their mental growth, creativity and imaginations at a very young age. At the age of 10, he starts differentiating between good and bad.

As he grows he starts leaving the habit of telling such foolish jokes. But what if, he doesn’t do so? It’s really a concern for parents it lying becomes a habit, and if kid tells lies necessarily and unnecessarily. How can we bring him out of this lying habit?

Remember – Parents are his role models

Kids learn the first things from their parents, and want to imitate their habits. For kids, their parents are always right, so are their activities and lies too. So, in family atmosphere or in society, when he closely watches his parents repeatedly telling lies, he slowly learns it. For him, telling lies is not at all a mistake, if parents do so!

When parents lies each other for silly things, when they seek support from kids to hide a lie, when they make contradictory remarks at home for a public comment they made about at neighbour’s home in front of others, parents just listen – you are teaching something wrong to your kids through your activities.

Kids have a tendency to tell harmless lies

A kid lies when others believe his words, and slowly he makes it a habit. Some harmless lies can be neglected, as long as he doesn’t make it a habit. When he lies of headache, fever etc to avoid doing homework or going to school and he gets a favourable reply from parents, he gets a tendency to repeat the same lie again. So it’s parents’ duty to check if their kid is lying or not. In most cases, parents have a false belief that their kid will never do anything wrong.

A few tips for parents to change lying habits of kids

The most important solution is to develop a feeling in your kid that parents believe in him. Such expectations play a significant role in blocking him from doing purposeful mistakes and lying. It also gives courage to your kid to openly communicate with parents, establishing good bonding and reveal his mistakes if he conducts any. When he openly admits his mistakes, for example: scribbling on wall or car’s surface, stay calm, and ask him not to repeat it. You can teach him repeatedly that it’s a bad habit, and slowly you can correct him.

Remember, your explosive behavior may be the main hindrance why your kid never gains courage to admit his mistakes. When he never admits the mistakes, how can we correct him?

Let me provide a few more useful parenting tips

Insecurity feeling, fear, mental problems and depression can also lead to lying habit in kids. You can seek the help of a doctor or psychiatrist if needed. Counseling can help a lot.  

Lying habit is frequently seen in children who lack self-confidence. Make them believe that failures are the stepping stones to success. Teach them new lessons from their failures and give them enough courage as well. They won’t hide their lies anymore.  

Keep your promises, it’s very important. If you have promised your kid something, do it at any cost. Otherwise he too will see no issues in breaking someone’s promise tomorrow. Note – Kids start learning these things at a very young age. Also never tell lies to break his promises, your kid will definitely know the truth today or tomorrow.

Telling him – admitting mistakes is courage. Kids or adults, people lie mostly to hide their mistakes. You can teach him good lessons of admitting mistakes if he has committed anything wrong. Slowly he will develop it as a habit. In fact admitting mistakes is courage, of course. It can gain him a lot of self-confidence as well, and slowly he prevents himself from repeating lies.

Never call him liar or bad boy – Such bad remarks can give negative impulses in your kid’s brain and mind, and break his heart. Mistakes are just a part of his growing phase, and try to correct them instead of blaming him. Otherwise he might think parents hate him.

Never make your kids’ lie creative – It’s ok to take light your kid’s lies. But never entertain or encourage them by praising him, or boasting about it to others. Your kid will repeat the same thing later to impress you. Remember, it’s ok to forgive him. But teach him, not to tell even harmless lies.

Learning problems can also prompt him to lie – Sometimes his poor performance in academics can also prompt him to lie about marks and school. Remember – never make your expectations a burden on kids’ shoulders. He may not be able to fulfill all your dreams. Yet if you feel that your kid has some learning problems, try to resolve it, spend a little more time with him and improve his skills.

Teach him the principles of innocence and truth – You should clearly teach your kid that even harmless and silly lies can harm him later, and not to hurt anyone by telling him lies and breaking his beliefs. Teach him the power the truth, and tell him that society will accept and respect us only for our virtue.

Never justify your mistakes – When you commit a mistake, admit it openly before your kid. Let him learn the lessons of courage to admit from you. When you justify and cover your mistakes, and never repeat it in the case of your kids, remember, you are passing some wrong lessons to him.

Always remember – Only those who regret their mistakes will think not to commit it second time. Let us train our kids to admit their mistakes first, teach them not to repeat it, and it’s sure they will listen to your words if you give them enough respect what they are seeking for. Give respect and take respect, it’s applicable even for our younger ones. 

Image source: Pixabay

Also read a few more articles on parenting. Click on the images in the gallery to read

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A freelance writer and blogger by profession since October 2011, interested in writing over a wide range of topics. Hope you enjoy my writings. I belong to one of the beautiful places of the world, Kerala, nicknamed as 'God's own country'.

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